03-05-2010, 05:35 AM
These events happened tonight, Thurs March 4th.
I had met a girl a week ago while out at BOSS and the details of the encounter are here. The main thing out that effects the event tonight is the fact the girl and I, HBBlue, parted with a short kiss and a hug. That helped set the tone for the events tonight.
Following Nick's get-a-girl-to-a-day2-within-9-days-of-meeting-her rule I set up a day2 tonight over the phone. Before I had decided where to go, I had two options
1) Go to the Howard Johnson hotel for city salsa vibe regular event
2) Go for a salsa party in the Joseph Richards Boutique Night Club for the vancouver salsa festival.
I chose the first event for several reasons: First, the party at the nightclub would have a VERY high level of energy, lots of distractions, lots of people with probably no isolation spots and I'd be setting myself up for competition for the whole night. The Howard Johnson hotel on the other hand it a regular place for me so I know a few ppl there, I know the music is good and the crowd is pretty mellow, and it's possible to build comfort there through conversation and kino b/c the music isn't too loud. In essence I chose the scene where I'd have more control and possibility in.
I set up the date on Tuseday and she asks me over the phone: "So do you have an idea in mind what to do or...?"
Me: "Of course"
Her: "Oh really?"
I tell her about the plan
Her: "Yeah, usually when I go to a hangout like that the guys are like "oh I don't know, what do you wanna do?" so I was kinda surprised you have plans"
I didn't believe at first that with all the advice out there on NOT TO DO THAT some guys still do, and at a large enough number that she can generalize from that. Oh well, just makes me look MORE awesome.
I try to figure her logistics so we can meet somewhere on the way, but she lives in the opposite side from where I'm coming from so we just decide to meet at the venue.
She txts me today asking "Hey what time are you wanting to go at tonight?"
I reply "Does 10ish work?"
Turns out the text didn't go through since she calls me later that day to ask the same question
More luck than brains on my part (my phone shows that the text went through), but shows she is interested. I tell her we meet there at 10 b/c I'm not really in the mood to do the beginners' class (from experience that is the worst energy vampire in salsa, you can go there all hyped up and by the end you just want to do hara-kiri).
On the way I open a middle aged lady at the bus stop to warm up. We talk through most of her bus ride and part when she needs to get off. Once the bus drops me off I realize one of two things is likely to happen:
1) Either HBBlue is already there (I'm strategically 10-15 mins late) and is probably dancing with someone else
2) Either HBBlue isn't there
(secret option (3) She is there and not dancing, not very likely)
So I decide in either of the cases I can't afford to walk in there and wait for her, so as I walk in I ask the first woman I see to dance (some middle aged lady, what is up with that tonight?) and we dance, talk, laugh and I locate HBBlue in the dancing crowd, I can tell she saw me so all I have to do is keep talking and having fun and she will come when the time is right.
The dance is over and my plan is to break off, but the middle aged lady takes me for another dance, ok no big deal. However I spot HBBlue sitting out for half the song and I realize that if I don't come up after that song I may overgame and lose this situation.
The second song is over, I part with the middle aged lady and come up giving HBBlue a hug. I try and start with a kiss on the lips, but end up on the forehead, meh work it out later. We dance for some time, have fun, talk, laugh, after 2 or 3 songs as I bring her up from a dip I give her a kiss. This time her friends aren't around so it can be longer without evoking anyone's objection or raising any ASD.
A few songs later, I need a drink of water and probably so does she. I go to the bar, ask for water, remember they only sell bottled water there so I pay for one. Now I'm in an interesting dilemma, I can buy her a water, but I don't feel like paying and it may be too early to be that comfortable with buying her stuff. On the other hand if i just have water for myself, I look like a tightass. So I take my bottle, and offer her some first. My plan is we can share the bottle, and if it runs out, make her buy the next round. Fair for everyone.
Before sitting down to rest I go to the DJ booth to make a request for a song she told me she likes (Xtreme - Te Extrano). It's a good song, usually one of my requests too, and it's bachata which is always fun. We dance close, and I mean CLOSE, there are no issues so I figure the rest of the night is good on autopilot. All I need to do is just not screw it up and build some comfort and more sexual investment.
Most of the night goes without anything new, dancing, making out shortly once every few dances, sit down, talk, she asks me random questions about my life, I talk and reciprocate trying to figure her out. It's all still part of the game, but it's the part you've known how to do all along. Everything that is "game" based is critical to get past the initial BS, but once that is gone, you can talk like normal people again, it's really cool.
Around 12:20 we decide to head off, by that time we're one of 3 remaining couples. We leave the other two couples be and head off. I ask her what bus she needs to take, she tells me where her stop is, I tell her I'll walk her there to make sure she gets on ok. I've done that several times with another girl I'm seeing at the moment and they can appreciate it if they like you. They like knowing you care about them.
She also tells me not too many guys do that either, and for most "chivalry is dead". So sounds like I scored more points there, yay
At some point I'm leaning against the pole for the stop and she's fidgeting around. I tell her she probably has more energy to dance, she says she's actually just trying to stay awake. I grab her waist and pull her over to me, she comes closer and leans her head against me. We're just getting closer now, bonding on some level, but it's clear to both her and I we're bonding as a couple. As the bus pulls in she thanks me for waiting with her, a long kiss goodbye. I tell her next week she should come by to SFU so I can show her around, she replies with "maybe". Between her schedule and possibly more exams I'm not concerned with that "maybe", it's a genuine "If I can make the time I would love to".
So good night all in all. There might be things I'm missing or could have gone even more with, but I'm content.
As usual, feedback and comments are welcome (that's why I'm posting this)
I had met a girl a week ago while out at BOSS and the details of the encounter are here. The main thing out that effects the event tonight is the fact the girl and I, HBBlue, parted with a short kiss and a hug. That helped set the tone for the events tonight.
Following Nick's get-a-girl-to-a-day2-within-9-days-of-meeting-her rule I set up a day2 tonight over the phone. Before I had decided where to go, I had two options
1) Go to the Howard Johnson hotel for city salsa vibe regular event
2) Go for a salsa party in the Joseph Richards Boutique Night Club for the vancouver salsa festival.
I chose the first event for several reasons: First, the party at the nightclub would have a VERY high level of energy, lots of distractions, lots of people with probably no isolation spots and I'd be setting myself up for competition for the whole night. The Howard Johnson hotel on the other hand it a regular place for me so I know a few ppl there, I know the music is good and the crowd is pretty mellow, and it's possible to build comfort there through conversation and kino b/c the music isn't too loud. In essence I chose the scene where I'd have more control and possibility in.
I set up the date on Tuseday and she asks me over the phone: "So do you have an idea in mind what to do or...?"
Me: "Of course"
Her: "Oh really?"
I tell her about the plan
Her: "Yeah, usually when I go to a hangout like that the guys are like "oh I don't know, what do you wanna do?" so I was kinda surprised you have plans"
I didn't believe at first that with all the advice out there on NOT TO DO THAT some guys still do, and at a large enough number that she can generalize from that. Oh well, just makes me look MORE awesome.
I try to figure her logistics so we can meet somewhere on the way, but she lives in the opposite side from where I'm coming from so we just decide to meet at the venue.
She txts me today asking "Hey what time are you wanting to go at tonight?"
I reply "Does 10ish work?"
Turns out the text didn't go through since she calls me later that day to ask the same question
More luck than brains on my part (my phone shows that the text went through), but shows she is interested. I tell her we meet there at 10 b/c I'm not really in the mood to do the beginners' class (from experience that is the worst energy vampire in salsa, you can go there all hyped up and by the end you just want to do hara-kiri).
On the way I open a middle aged lady at the bus stop to warm up. We talk through most of her bus ride and part when she needs to get off. Once the bus drops me off I realize one of two things is likely to happen:
1) Either HBBlue is already there (I'm strategically 10-15 mins late) and is probably dancing with someone else
2) Either HBBlue isn't there
(secret option (3) She is there and not dancing, not very likely)
So I decide in either of the cases I can't afford to walk in there and wait for her, so as I walk in I ask the first woman I see to dance (some middle aged lady, what is up with that tonight?) and we dance, talk, laugh and I locate HBBlue in the dancing crowd, I can tell she saw me so all I have to do is keep talking and having fun and she will come when the time is right.
The dance is over and my plan is to break off, but the middle aged lady takes me for another dance, ok no big deal. However I spot HBBlue sitting out for half the song and I realize that if I don't come up after that song I may overgame and lose this situation.
The second song is over, I part with the middle aged lady and come up giving HBBlue a hug. I try and start with a kiss on the lips, but end up on the forehead, meh work it out later. We dance for some time, have fun, talk, laugh, after 2 or 3 songs as I bring her up from a dip I give her a kiss. This time her friends aren't around so it can be longer without evoking anyone's objection or raising any ASD.
A few songs later, I need a drink of water and probably so does she. I go to the bar, ask for water, remember they only sell bottled water there so I pay for one. Now I'm in an interesting dilemma, I can buy her a water, but I don't feel like paying and it may be too early to be that comfortable with buying her stuff. On the other hand if i just have water for myself, I look like a tightass. So I take my bottle, and offer her some first. My plan is we can share the bottle, and if it runs out, make her buy the next round. Fair for everyone.
Before sitting down to rest I go to the DJ booth to make a request for a song she told me she likes (Xtreme - Te Extrano). It's a good song, usually one of my requests too, and it's bachata which is always fun. We dance close, and I mean CLOSE, there are no issues so I figure the rest of the night is good on autopilot. All I need to do is just not screw it up and build some comfort and more sexual investment.
Most of the night goes without anything new, dancing, making out shortly once every few dances, sit down, talk, she asks me random questions about my life, I talk and reciprocate trying to figure her out. It's all still part of the game, but it's the part you've known how to do all along. Everything that is "game" based is critical to get past the initial BS, but once that is gone, you can talk like normal people again, it's really cool.
Around 12:20 we decide to head off, by that time we're one of 3 remaining couples. We leave the other two couples be and head off. I ask her what bus she needs to take, she tells me where her stop is, I tell her I'll walk her there to make sure she gets on ok. I've done that several times with another girl I'm seeing at the moment and they can appreciate it if they like you. They like knowing you care about them.
She also tells me not too many guys do that either, and for most "chivalry is dead". So sounds like I scored more points there, yay
At some point I'm leaning against the pole for the stop and she's fidgeting around. I tell her she probably has more energy to dance, she says she's actually just trying to stay awake. I grab her waist and pull her over to me, she comes closer and leans her head against me. We're just getting closer now, bonding on some level, but it's clear to both her and I we're bonding as a couple. As the bus pulls in she thanks me for waiting with her, a long kiss goodbye. I tell her next week she should come by to SFU so I can show her around, she replies with "maybe". Between her schedule and possibly more exams I'm not concerned with that "maybe", it's a genuine "If I can make the time I would love to".
So good night all in all. There might be things I'm missing or could have gone even more with, but I'm content.
As usual, feedback and comments are welcome (that's why I'm posting this)
